Death to Fung

Well, I've really been dogging myself for buggering out of the diet a bit early. But I realized this morning that with the exception of one cheat meal, I only started eating about four days early so I guess I can't feel too bad about that. tomorrow is officially the end of it for me, so I'll get a final weight and some pics up then. I don't think I've lost so much in my gut, but perhaps my arms and legs are a bit leaner.
I did manage to lock out 245 over head yesterday. That's good, I suppose.

Mission Failure

Let's face it. I started my "taper" a week early. I know, I know. I'm a dirty rotten piece of poo. But I'm a healthier dirty rotten piece of poo than I was before I started this thing. I just couldn't stand the thought of going another week without training, and training was out of the question without some extra calories in me. To make it up to you guys, I'm going to spend the next five minutes in utter self loathing.
OK. On to the important stuff. Bryant and I have collectively agreed to drop the dripping black hole of estrogen workout and go back to man work. Mike has jumped back in with us in the afternoons so it'll be great to have an extra spotter and some more energy in the garage. Yesterday we tested squats. I managed to eek out 455 for a good full ROM. It was a little tougher than I was expecting but OK I guess for not haveing done any squats (those overhead things don't count) for over a month.
Good times. That's all I got for now.

Sunday "Stones" workout

Friday

Had some energy yesterday and decided I was tired of pretending to be a hatchet wound.

Frontal Squatage:
135 x 5 x 1
185 x 5 x 1
225 x 5 x 3

CGB:
225 x 5 x 2
245 x 5 x 2
275 x 5 x 1

chin-ups:
BW x 5 x 1
BW+20 x 5 x 4

Push Press:
95 x 5 x 1
115 x 5 x 1
145 x 5 x 2
165 x 5 x 1

Laughter is fattening

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Monday Number Three

My brain functions are failing. I've discovered that this caloric deficit is making my memory about as useful as a poopy flavoured lollipop (I tried to come up with something original, but those neurons have quit firing altogether). I've lost about seven pounds, but I really don't feel any healthier. My blood pressure monitor says that I am healthier, but is that because I'm depriving myself of energy or beer? I feel like Chris Shugart and the Biotest gang left out an important component to their V-Diet: body composition. Age, height, and weight are fine, but if I'm 215lbs and say 18% body fat and the smelly dude next to me is 215lbs and 85% body fat, we're going to have different caloric needs. Of course, the creators of the velocity diet know this, but they would have trouble selling $500+ worth of protein at a time if they overcomplicated the system.
OK. I'm done with my rant. I still don't regret doing this because several positive things have come from the process and I intend to finish the month out strong. I just wish I had the strength of will to do it without a "packaged" deal. I believe going forward, I will.

Did V-challenge yesterday morning.

Bent over rows:
1 x 5 135
3 x 5 225 (used straps)

Overhead Squats:
4 x 5 95 (F*%K these things)

Dips:
4 x 5 Bw (got through these as fast as possible. Too lazy to ad weight)

Ab Wheelies
4 x 5 Bryant pushing down on my back

On a happier note, I bought 50ft of 3/4 poly rope to start pulling Bryant's Corolla through my barn. Hopefully, I can work up to the Tahoe soon.

Weekend in Paradise

so the tirp to Amarillo went pretty well. Pops new I was on a diet but he didn't know it cut out all drinking. The funny thing is, he's not really drinking much either. So I walk in and he points me to a cooler full of Bud Light. I didn't drink any and he only had one or two, so all weekend there's this icey cold cooler full of beers staring at me. Very bad temptation that was.
On a more positive note, I did buy the parts for my strongman yoke. Couldn't beleive that 12 ft of galvanized pipe and few connectors cost me nearly a c-note. Oh well, I guess everything is a huge rip off at this point in time. I still got a functional training tool to add to my arsenal and if I'd bought a nice pre-built it would of cost me at least three hundo.
Bryant and I did the v-challenge this morning. It went down even easier than last week. I'm starting to recover some agility, flexibility, and overall spring-ability. Kind of nice.

Starvation tip for the day: A splash of Tabasco Sauce in the mouth when I'm starving makes my brain happy for a while.

A Fortnight Falls

Sounds like a good book.
Weighed upon rising and peeing this morning at 202 lbs. Went for a walk and took a poop that brought me down to 201 lbs. So, I'm officially a half-stone and one down from my starting weight.
Speaking of stones, I just ordered the book "Of Stones and Strength" by Steve Jeck. Been wanting to get that for a while. Its this guy's story of traveling around the world to pick up the most famous clach cuid fir (I'm pretty sure you have to say that with a Gaelic accent to get it right). I got inspired when I hatched my first large, 16", atlas stone last night. She's heavy, but I did manage to shoulder it without a lot of stress. It'll make a nice traing rock, but I need one about a hundred pounds heavier to get serious with.
Hope you guys have a grand ol Friday!

Cheers.

gnarcrimper what!?

So this is the last day of week two for me. Hooray. I feel good, but I'm getting really tired of having not so much energy and even less food. Oh well.
Yesterday's workout was a hot one:

WG pullups:
5x8 bw

Strt leg deads:
5 x 8 205

Incln DB bench (ng)
5 x 8 65 (made it thru, but I was running out of steam in a hurry)

BB curlz
1 x 8 65
4 x 8 85 (last set was growler, but I kept it moving.)

Hanging leg lifts
5 x 8 (need to get some ankle weights)

Healthy little workout there, but I'm really itchin to start picking up some weight again. If nothing else, I think this program is going to get me into good enough shape to start up my old school weight maintenance program. I like to call it Train Your Ass Off Six or Seven Days a Week. At leas that's what I'm going to name the book. Cheers, yo!

Stabbed by the knife of emptyness

I'M SO FREAKING HUNGRY. Some evil human brought cakes and propped one up in both kitchens. I can smell chocolat and buttercream every time I get a freaking cup of coffee. I don't even like cake. Oh well. Almost time for a healthy delicious shake.

Monday workout:
RG BB rows:
5x5 145 = gay

overhead squats
2x5 95
1x3 95 (a spring somehow shot out of my hip. decided not to finish this exserce.)

dips
5x5 bw + 45 (light)

ab wheel
5 x 6 (cuz I wanted to)

Num num

Pork tenderloin, spinach salad, slice tomatoes with feta and basil, grilled broccoli with squash and zucchini, deviled eggs. My, Oh My! That meal just nearly put me into a coma. The V-challenge was much less challenging this go around. I was still soaking wet and standing with my head in the AC when it was over, but there was little fear of blacking out or puking this time. In fact, I felt pretty energized, considering that we played six straight hours of paintball on Saturday and I could barely crawl out of bed Sunday morning. I'm still pretty happy with progress so far. I'm a bit concerned that I'm losing some strength, specifically in my primary lifts. But I don't think it will be much and I'm sure it will come back real quick. At least I hope so. I'll have roughly one month to prepare for this strongman comp. M' gonna have to make the most of it.

OK. Fine.

Arlington, TX - June 27, 2009. Anybody got anything planned? OK, then. If I can stay under 200lbs, I think I can make a dent in this one. It's all gonna swing on my weight and how much strength I can recover after may. I don't think I'll lose much strength, but I am really anxious to start training for the events. B- I'll need your car. Light weights gotta pull a 4 cylinder car (I know what you're thinking. no harness. this is seated arm-over-arm pulling. I've got a strong back and a place to train for it). Heavy weights, a Hummer. Pays to be light and cock-strong.
I REALLY want to do a strongman comp this year and it looks like this might be my only option. There's a pretty cool one next weekend in AlbQ, I'm guessing at the festival, but of course I can't make that one. Check it out for me C-dog. Might be a possibility for next year.

Yesterday's workout:
Front squats
5x5 185lbs (no belt)

CG Bench
5x5 225lbs (much easier than week one)

chins
5x5 bw (could've added some weight, but I was really focusing on full ROM)

Push press
5x5 145lbs (could've gone a bit heavier with these. the heat was getting me.)

News Flashes

Number One:
Cody is the High King Shizznit for sending me four fresh jars of nut butter! Yeah. Doesn't really sound so good when I put it down like that, but I also don't really care. The almond butter was refreshing to my soul tonight. Can't wait to try the sunflower seed goo tomorrow night. Happy birthday to me! Thanks man.

Number Two:
Just got an email from the director of the Battle of the Borders in NM. Looks like the strongman comp is on for July 25th. That gives me roughly two months to train like mad and keep my weight down after this diet is over. He already sent me the events and the weights to train for. I've just got to find a truck to pull. Mayhaps we can incorporate some climbing into that trip, hmm...

I'm so pumped!

New week: Day 8

Had another tough night avoiding the booze last night. Really just yesterday afternoon. Got past it and got some work done around the house. I guess I kind of let it sneak up on me. Nevertheless, I'm still on track. I suppose nobody said this would be easy. My weight this morning, post poop, was 204.5. That puts me right at 5lbs in a week. I expected that; however, before I went on my walk this morning I checked my blood pressure. Came in at 136/72 with a pulse of 60 bpm. Now then, I quit taking my blood pressure meds on Monday. I figured it would come down if I ever sobered up, but I had to know if it was because my body was working properly or because of some crack rock the drug dealer at the clinic handed me. Well, my genetics and my doctor can kiss my ass. Looks like my heart is just sensitive to rediculously unhealthy living. Go figure. Guess I'll have to cinch the belt up live healthier the rest of my life.
This is getting easier every day. I'm pretty amped about today's workout. It's roughly a million degrees and I've got some sweatin to do.

Se7en

Workout stats:

WG pullups
4 x 8 bw
1 x 5 bw
1 x 3 bw

Deads
Went way light on these, but I did each set like a mating jackrabbit.
5 x 8 115lbs

Incln bench - palms in
5 x 8 65's

BB curlz
4 x 8 75lbs
1 x 5 75
1 x 3 75

Leg raises
5 x 8 bw (love these things)

Not bad. Sweating like crazy. Bryant has chocolate surge and I have raspberry. We decided to do a scoop of each. Tasted like chocolate raspberry sphincter. Week two starts tomorrow. I'll weigh tonight.

Stay strong, yo!

Note:

Tonight will mark a ten year record for sobriety.

Day 5

I can smell EVERYTHING. It's cruel that I have to walk through my kitchen to get to my bedroom and bathroom. I swear I can tell what's been left open on the counters as soon as I walk in the front door. Yesterday afternoon the beer/booze bug bit me pretty hard. I think I have some scars from the battle that ensued, but I fought it off. And as it turns out, I'm pretty sure I saw the top of my abs pop up and wink at me in the mirror this morning. I won't weigh until Friday, but I know I'm down. So perhaps the rewards will start to come in along with the struggles.

I can only concur with C that the NEPA is mostly targeted at us cubicle pirates. Not that his job is any more physically demanding than mine. However, not having to prepare a breakfast in the morning has afforded me plenty of time to go for a good walk. It hasn't really been about the exercise for me. I get up and pop a couple of Hot Rox and head out the door. That stuff kills the hunger and honestly tweaks me up to a fun little buzz. I get to spend 30-45 minutes just walking with God before the rest of the world has a chance to climb on my back. I'm gonna try to keep this up after the diet is over. Looking forward to this afternoon's workout. Should be crazy intense.

Day 4

I thought this workout was a joke compared to Friday's. the overhead squats were a lot tougher than I expected. it quickly became obvious that those are a pure stability excersice. On my first rep my spinal erectors siezed up and I nearly dropped the bar on my head. Not to mention that my lats were completely fried from that V-challange (stangely enough) wich didn't aid in stabilizing anything.

Rev Grip rows: 5x5 145

overhead squats: 1x5 95, 3x5 65

dips: 1x5 45, 3x5 80

ab wheelies: 4x5 bw

Not exactly intense, but I guess it did the job.

HSM

OK. We had our HSM today. this may seem wrong to those who made it thru the entire 6 or 7 days before getting in a good meal. However, I feel justified for the following reasons.
I did my V-challenge on the third day of my diet. I knew from looking at the thing that it would suck. However, I did not know the extent to which it would suck when living on a caloric deficit with almost no carbs pre-workout. When we were done I regained some rational thought patterns I realized with glee that it was time for my third shake. within an hour of drinking that, I could barely get up and walk across the living room. It wasn't because I was starving or my muscles were broke down, I just didn't have any gas left. Nothing. I started thinking about the glycogen and mineral depletion I had just put my body through and I decided it was time to look at a calendar and see what my options were. I should have been eating my HSM on Thursdays, but that's not a workout day and that seems like a bit of a waste of good energy. If you do it at the end of every week, you end up finishing the diet with a rewarding meal and then continue on having solid meals every day after that. That's kind of a bummer. I've got to do 4 V-challenges thru this. I figure I can eat my HSM on those days since mine came towards the beginning of my first week. Mentally I'll know that I'll have less problems killing the workout if I've got a rewarding meal coming to me afterwards. Finally, I really wanted to eat some of the pizza* I made for my niece's birthday. Had two slices of pizza with a giant pile of raw veggies. Skipped the ranch dip and rocky road cupcakes.

*I made the pizzas healthy as possible using stone ground whole wheat flour for the dough, boiled chicken, and turkey pepperoni. Although I used less cheese than usual, the saturated fat in it has nearly killed me. A word of warning: if you haven't already had a high fat HSM, don't. Your body doesn't want that crap anymore and it will reject it. At least mine did.

Peace out.

hurl

The V-challenge can lick my shlong.
did one round on the advanced circuit and thought I would die for sure. Dropped to the intermediate and barley finished. I'm pretty sure if B hadn't been there I would have quit by round three. Had to take several minute breaks between circuits and some of those were standing with my face in an air conditioner trying not to puke or black out. Icky. I do feel much better today. I think it will continue to get easier, or at least that's been the trend for the last two days. We'll see about the next 25.

Cheers.

Dia Dos

I think today was better. Still hungry. I burned off too many calories over the day and am paying for it now. Didn't sleep last night, played paintball this morning and finished digging a ditch and re-covering it. I'm about to drop.
However, let me tell you why I'm the king shizznit. I made three pizzas tonight and actually tasted two of the sauces and spit them out with no swallowage. Had to keep from burying my face in the giant bags of cheese.
gonna go to bed now.

v-challange tomorrow.

Day 1

The workout was pretty intense. Since I started on Friday I went ahead and did the Day three workout. Within one set I was able to nail the numbers pretty acurately and the thirty second rests sucked the life right out of me. I think I got through the entire workout in just under half an hour, in a garage, at 98 degrees, 200% humidity.

front sqauts: 185lbs 5x5
CG bench press: 225 5x5
chin up: body weight 5x5
Push presses: 115 5x5

thought i was going to sweat to death.

Mantastic

Dang, I'm hungry. Had to go to the grocery store at lunch to pick up some things for Meg. That was a mistake. Fortunately I had a shake right before I went. I actually found...

(Wow. I just now got a call from Megan's sister asking me if I would make pizzas for my niece's birthday on Sunday. Obviously, Satan has once again been roaming the earth, and God said "Have you considered my servant Glenn?". The worst part is that I agreed to do it.)

...myself staring at the bags of frozen tripe. Anyhow, here's the promised pictures. If you're hungry now, you wont be after this. I had a 10oz T-bone, about a half pound of cheddar mashed potatoes, a salad, two beers, and about a half bottle of moon shine right before these were taken.