Poopie line up (from left to right). This image is from Paul Chek’s, “How to Eat, Move, and Be Healthy.”
Sinker n’ Stinker: This guy is named as he behaves. He is like a smelly piece of black coal that sinks to the bottom of the bowl after an arduous attempt to squeeze him out with tremendous force. His appearance is due to an overexposure to toxins such as processed foods, environmental toxins, and medical drugs.
The Swimmer: This guy is light in color and floats. He is a pain to flush. His appearance is due to a high content of undigested fat.
Bodybuilder: This dude is jacked! He is typically big and round. He makes you strain to get him out. If you pop a blood vessel in your eyeball when you poop, you’ve probably met this guy. His appearance is due to eating too many protein bars and shakes.
Pellet Man: He looks like rabbit poop. His appearance is due to altered states between peristalsis and dehydration.
Diarrhea: “If you’re sliding into first and you feel something burst…” This guy needs no introduction. His appearance is due to your crappy diet and your body’s attempt to purge you of it.
The Flasher: If you can identify what you’ve eaten by looking at your poop, you are being flashed! Undigested food particles making an appearance in your bowl are a sure sign that this guy has crashed your party. His appearance is due to food intolerance and an inflamed gut wall.
The Poopie Policeman: This guy is “the shit!” He is what all of our poop strive to look like. He is well-shaped (with a consistent contour), passes easily, is light brown in color, and smells earthy, not foul. Yet, he floats…but not too much. Mmmm.
4 comments:
Like i said, i'm a li'l amped bout the inking. my idea keeps getting bigger and bigger. Think i'm looking at most of a back piece presently. i have this Urban Climber mag sitting before the toily with a cover shot of this guy with a half torso wrap-around into a full sleeve. So last night we were brushing our teeth, and i casually slid that into our conversation to get a flash reaction from steph. it wasn't so good. In fact, i'd say her reaction qualified as antipathy. But i do think i could get by with some widespread back work. Now it's just a matter of coming up with the funds. (i'm afraid if it comes to a showdown 'twixt this and the ink...)
Anyhow, i'm off to liberate a policeman. And scribble me down a rough-out of yer sleeve idear, eh.
I'm pretty sure the ink will be less than the bike. Hey, meg has convinced herself that the hennah she got done in Mex she wants to make permanent. I'm pretty stoked, cuz its hot.
most phat. congrats.
i don't know whats worse... lookin at a scot's yam bag or a caricature of human scat
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