regular reflexions

Poopie line up (from left to right). This image is from Paul Chek’s, “How to Eat, Move, and Be Healthy.”

Sinker n’ Stinker: This guy is named as he behaves. He is like a smelly piece of black coal that sinks to the bottom of the bowl after an arduous attempt to squeeze him out with tremendous force. His appearance is due to an overexposure to toxins such as processed foods, environmental toxins, and medical drugs.

The Swimmer: This guy is light in color and floats. He is a pain to flush. His appearance is due to a high content of undigested fat.

Bodybuilder: This dude is jacked! He is typically big and round. He makes you strain to get him out. If you pop a blood vessel in your eyeball when you poop, you’ve probably met this guy. His appearance is due to eating too many protein bars and shakes.

Pellet Man: He looks like rabbit poop. His appearance is due to altered states between peristalsis and dehydration.

Diarrhea: “If you’re sliding into first and you feel something burst…” This guy needs no introduction. His appearance is due to your crappy diet and your body’s attempt to purge you of it.

The Flasher: If you can identify what you’ve eaten by looking at your poop, you are being flashed! Undigested food particles making an appearance in your bowl are a sure sign that this guy has crashed your party. His appearance is due to food intolerance and an inflamed gut wall.

The Poopie Policeman: This guy is “the shit!” He is what all of our poop strive to look like. He is well-shaped (with a consistent contour), passes easily, is light brown in color, and smells earthy, not foul. Yet, he floats…but not too much. Mmmm.

shushami

Rather than post the same comments to both of your bloggies, I'll just plop it up here. We're back from the island. It was a much needed blasty-blast. Now i'm in Houston. Hooray. Got to spend a whopping five minutes with my kids before an exec started whining. Now I'm here. Blake's actually getting old enough to get pissed when I leave. That sucks. I like those kids. Sure hope this crap pays off for em'. Hmmm....just realized that I'm speaking in short phrases. I suppose that's what vodka and Squirt(tm) will do for you.
I did, however, find an artist to do the tat work I've been scheming up here in houston. I've found many great artists that could do the job, but it takes time to do it right and I'm here more than anywhere else. Should be nice. (Cody, we should still go check out the place in al-b-q to get some ink in ya. That place was my first choice, just didn't know when I'd ever have the time.) Check out http://superchangotattoo.com/wp/ Pruett is the guy that is working on mine. Said it would take a while to put together. Guess I'll be having several sessions every time I come to a board meeting. Should pass the time.
Blah, blah, blah...I'm out of steam.

peaceout

Countdown to launch

Props to my boy B for getting high marks on his last test!

Bling Bling

I pressed out 365 much easier than last week. Felt good about that. Shot for 375 and missed it. But I did get it off my chest. It'll go up soon.

We leave for Cozumel on Thursday. Apparently there is a tropical storm hovering over the island at the moment. Good thing it's an all you can drink hotel. Sex. MaiTai. Sex. MaiTai. Sex. Maitai. This could be the best vacation ever!

木曜日

This has got to be one of the best workout weeks I've had in a while. Haven't been drinking much. I give that as much credit as anything else. It amazing how productive I can be in a day when it doesn't include getting smished. So monday I bagged a new bench PR. Tuesday we weren't scheduled to do anything, but Mike had missed Monday so I decided to get out of bed and meet him in the morining and help him with his bench. He was about half an hour late, so I decided to do some extra shoulder work. I worked up to a standing overhead press of 225lb for a single. That's a pr for me, but I haven't really been working it all that hard. I've got to get my shoulders stronger and my form better for overhead pressing if I expect to do anything with strongman next year. I finished up with some heavy one hand dumbell clean and presses. These have got to be one of my favorite excersises because of the huge range of muscles that it works. You can just about do these with no weight and still be sweating your butt off after a couple of sets. Yesterday would normally have been our outside workout at my place but we decided to meet in the gym and do some squat work. I slept in. At noon I went in determined to do squats in my jeans and boots. Didn't even bring a shirt to change into so I went topless. I was dressed in exactly what you shouldn't wear to do a squat workout. All the same, I managed to work up to two sets of six with 405. Next I decided to pull some heavy weight off the safety pins from just below knee hight. Worked up to 405 for an easy three or four and decided to start doing singles and not count the weight as I stacked in on. My last attempts I added on 50 lbs. and missed twice. I thought it was around 515 just glancing at it (we're out of 45lb plates at 405 so I was using smaller weights). After a lot of screaming, grunting, and straining I added it up to 575. I was pissed I couldn't get it, but 525 went pretty easily. I'm still gunning to pull 500 off the floor by the end of the year. Today was speed bench day. 8 sets of three with 255. Now I'm ready to rest a couple o days.

Monday. Again.

I bagged 365 on the bench today. Wouldn't exactly say I crushed it, but it went nevertheless. Kind of surprising really. I was tired and running late this morning. Then I had to make an emergency stop at the truck stop for an early morning colon blow. I'll never put Tabasco on mac and cheese again. Anyhow, by the time I got to the gym the other's had finished benching. I did four rushed warm ups, huffed some ammonia, and sent it home. The funny thing was, even as I climbed under the bar, I really didn't think I had it in me today. It's never happened that I didn't think I would get a weight and then actually got it. I can only assume that I've gotten stronger. Goooo Me! Only forty pounds to go by the end of the year.

Monday

Didn't sleep at all last night. That was a bit painful as I went to bed really early. I think it had something to do with my diet. Yesterday was a pretty drastic change for me. Very little fat, high protein, high fiber, low sugar. Several small meals spaced through the day. I think maybe I was having fat withdrawals, or possibly alcohol withdrawals. Who knows. I still managed to drag out of bed at 5:15 and go to the gym. Wasn't my best day of lifting, but it felt great and I broke a good sweat. Here's the funny part. I feel great this morning. Usually by now, I'd be snoring at my desk, but I feel like I've had a good nights sleep. I weighed in at 210.5 this morning. That means that I've pooped out four pounds in the last couple of days. My goal is to be at 198 by the end of this month.